You are viewing Noah's Aches..a little fun stuff from the "Somthing Special " Branch of Wren's World.  We hope you will enjoy your time spent here, and will also visit other branches of  WrensWorld City Nest, WrensWorld Harbor Nest, The Kids Nest, Wren's Proud To Be American Branch, Wren's free n easy greeting cards, and the Chapel in WrensWorld all contain many inspirational poems, stories, seasonal and holiday poems, patriotic poems, Java applets, Christian content, jokes, and games.

Panorama Applet loading - please be patient.

Noah's Aches title graphic.

Noah and a pair of lions.


The Lord spoke to Noah and said, "In six months I am going to make it rain until the whole world is covered with water and all the evil things are destroyed.  But, I want to save a few good people and two of every living thing on the planet.  I am ordering you to build an ark."

And, in a flash of lightning, he delivered the specifications for the ark.
And the lightening flashed!
"OK," Noah said, trembling with fear and fumbling with the blueprints, "I'm your man."

Six months passed, the sky began to cloud up, and the rain began to fall in torrents.  The Lord looked down and saw Noah sitting in his yard, weeping, and there was no ark.

"Noah!" shouted the Lord, "Where is My ark?"  A lightning bolt crashed into the ground right beside Noah
And the rains came down!
"Lord, please forgive me!" begged Noah.  "I did my best, but there were some big problems.  First, I had to get a building permit for the ark's construction, but Your plans did not meet their code.  So, I had to hire an engineer to redo the plans, only to get into a long argument with him about whether to include a fire sprinkler system.

My neighbors objected, claiming that I was violating zoning ordinances by building the ark in my front yard, so I had to get a variance from the city planning board.

The Ark that caused the aches.
Then, I had a big problem getting enough wood for the ark, because there was a ban on cutting trees to save the spotted owl.  I tried to convince the environmentalists and the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service that I needed the wood to save the owls, but they wouldn't let me catch them anyway ... so no owls!

Next, I started gathering up the animals but got sued by an animal rights group that objected to me taking along only two of each kind.

Just when the suit got dismissed, the EPA notified me that I couldn't complete the ark without filling out an environmental impact statement on Your proposed flood.  They didn't take kindly to the idea that they had no jurisdiction over the Supreme Being.

Then, the Corps of Engineers wanted a map of the proposed flood plan.  I sent them a globe!

Right now, I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Equal Opportunities Commission over how many minorities I'm supposed to hire.

The IRS has seized all my assets claiming that I am trying to leave the country, and I just got a notice from the state that I owe some kind of use tax.

I really don't think I can finish the ark in less than five years."

With that, the sky cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow arched across the sky.

Noah's blessed with a rainbow.

Noah looked up and smiled.  "You mean you are not going to destroy the world?" he asked hopefully.

"No," said the Lord.  "The government already has!"

~ Author Unknown ~



Sign Guest Book Send this page using Send2Friend's free serviice? View Guest Book


Other Pages and Branches of WrensWorld

Please select from the Drop-Down Menu, and click "Go Now".



A listing of all the newest pages added to Alphabetical listing of all the pages in Wren's World Home Page Site problems or comments?  Please email  Thank you...Wren.




"The Unicorn"
Sequencer: Barry Taylor